Oh yes. I see you, Secret Follower. I saw you the day you began to anonymously follow my little blog and after a somewhat flattered moment of surprise and glee, I began to obsess because that's just what I do.
Who was this Secret Follower? Was it someone I knew? Why would someone I didn't know follow my neophyte blog of randomness and bitchy? Then again I guess I don't really know Sara and we follow each other so perhaps this was a flawed question? To what purpose would this Secret Follower keep his or her identity anonymous? To spy on me for work and make sure I'm not blogging company secrets and nullifying my licenses which I earned with Red Bull, bloody tears and eye twitches? Because they actually don't like me and want to know if I blog about them, OFFICE LOONY? Was it one of Office Loony's equally sorry friends keeping tabs and reporting back to her because she is actually crazier than I am? Was it Husband's ex-girlfriend, of whose co-blog I am myself an anonymous follower (hey, I'm curious), here to give me a taste of my own medicine? Was it one of those two ex-roommates against whom I still nurse age-old grudges and know they feel similarly? Was it my ex-boyfriend in Texas, who I am pretty sure googles me from time to time? Was it someone googling that artist in Seattle with my name and thought perhaps they'd stumbled upon her blog and decided to follow it thusly? That still didn't explain the anonymous part though. No no, this Secret Follower was really just for me, aren't you, Secret Follower?
The secret follow began after Kailey started following me so perhaps it was someone affiliated with her? What about one of her ex-co-workers, who are still co-workers with Husband? I went to Kailey's blog and scoured her most recent post to see who had commented after me. Then I went to her Facebook page and looked at who had commented on her status update about writing a new blog post just for me. Then I googled "How to find out who your secret follower is," and several variations on that query, which was, by and large, quite useless.
Then I remembered this one time that I was dinking around with Blogger and somehow accidentally downloaded all my blog information to my computer, and it gave me a whole bunch of information I didn't even know I wanted, including the real name of a blogger I really love in Philadelphia because somehow her blog-specific email address was linked to her personal email address which is comprised of her full name and I was like "oh hey, cool! That's a pretty name I'll be googling later. SCORE." And I thought maybe if I could get Blogger to do that again, perhaps it would show me in the HTML who is anonymously following my blog, so I fumbled and I fumbled and figured out how to make it happen-- and guess what?
GUESS WHAT, SECRET FOLLOWER??
I made it work! And now I know who you are, although I still don't know why you prefer the shadowy hallways of Anonymity. Maybe you won't now that I've flashed a light into your dark corner. Feel free to expound upon your decision, as anonymous followers are still able to comment and/or email the blog owner. But do whatever you want! You can even stay a Secret Follower who is markedly less secret. It's a free country and a free internet and a free Blogger, and you and I can go about our days now-- you with your mask, me with my smug.
